Are You A Conditional Lover?

Are You A Conditional Lover?

We’ve all heard the term “unconditional love", but what does that term mean to you?

Does it mean that no matter how another person behaves, you’ll never walk away from them? Or does it mean that you do walk away and send them away with “love” while you internally loathe them and everything about them?

Has anyone ever told you they love you unconditionally, but you don’t feel like they lived up to that promise?

If you’re a parent, you may have settled on the definition of unconditional love being that you may not always like your kid, but you’ll always love them. Which honestly seems like a pretty solid idea of what unconditional love really is.

But for most people in our lives, we all know there is a limit to our love. There are things our friends and even our family could do or say that would make us stop loving them or at least stop liking them. So, do we really love anyone unconditionally?

If you’ve ever wondered this about the relationships in your own life. If you’ve ever questioned whether unconditional love is truly possible. If the staggering divorce rates make you wonder if human beings are actually capable of unconditional love, I invite you to ponder a thing with me.

What if we were never meant to be unconditional lovers of people, but unconditional lovers of life?

What Does It Mean to Be An Unconditional Lover Of Life?

What if we think of ourselves as trains. Big trains, strong trains, fast trains. Let’s say we’re headed north. Remember, we’re big, strong and fast and we’re heading north. What would happen if a smaller train came behind us and hooked itself to us in an attempt to pull us south, in the opposite direction we’re currently headed? 

Likely, as the big, strong, fast trains that we are, we wouldn't even notice the smaller train at all. 

That smaller train could not stop us. We’re bigger, stronger and faster and we’re determined to head north. Nothing is stopping us.

In this train analogy, north is love, peace, happiness. The smaller train could be seen as any person, situation, or circumstance that does not produce love, peace, and happiness in your life. 

If we allow the little train (people, situations and conditions) to pull us off track and change our direction, doesn't that mean that our love is really based on the conditions. I will love you if you act a certain way or I'll be happy if this situation goes the way I want it to go. 

What if we could all find a way to be unconditional lovers of life to the point where we could be less reactionary towards the people, situations, and circumstances in our lives. 

I know, easier said than done. In my next blog, I'd like to cover some practical tools we can use to actively become unconditional lovers of life. 

But I'll give you the first step now, if this blog taught you that your love may be conditional, don't beat yourself up. It's okay. Let's just all learn together how we can become unconditional lovers of life and in the process be the big, strong, fast trains we were born to be. 

Until next time. 

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